I’m inviting you to walk with me on a journey…into Recovery.
Getting stuck on the hamster wheel of the chaos and despair that Addiction can plunge us all into – is not an option. Why? Because if we get stuck, that takes away our potential to live a fulfilled life and it also gives our addict permission to stay exactly where he/she is – stuck in the Cycle of Addiction. .
If you make the choice to pursue your own recovery, that will help your addicted child (or loved one) more than anything else.
It’s a bit like standing up to the bully in the playground. Addiction is a powerful bully. But you can turn the tables on it. Use the tools and techniques I’m going to give you in these pages to stand up to Addiction, and like all bullies, it will back off. You and your family will start to get your lives back. Together, we can alter the power balance.
There are no guarantees – I can’t promise that your addict will recover. You, however, can definitely recover.
And in doing so, you give your child the best possible chance of making her own recovery.
What Does Recovery Look Like?
We know we are in recovery when we are on the way to a state where:
- We have restored order out of chaos
- Our family relationships have ceased to be dysfunctional
- And our lives have become manageable again.
If this sounds like a tall order and you’re suddenly feeling an overwhelming temptation to Google something inconsequential – hang on, stay with me here a bit longer. Make a cup of tea and then imagine you’re sitting with me in a cafe and it would be rude to leave right now. Go on – get that tea or a coffee, maybe some cake if you feel like it.
Ready? Enjoying your tea break? Here we go….
We can break this process of recovery down into chunks to make the whole thing easier.
Recovery Base Camp
1) If we knock two things on the head, we’ll actually be well on our way with our recovery. Those things are:
So see the posts on Denial and Enabling in The Stages We Go Through section of the Parent’s Journey. Just read them for the moment. When you are ready, practise the tips in those posts for knocking Denial and Enabling on the head.
2) We need to have a sound understanding of Addiction. So if you haven’t already read the section on Understanding Addiction, I strongly encourage you to do so. There are many misconceptions about the nature of Addiction. But if you are well-informed on the topic, it will be like the difference between running a marathon having trained for months beforehand, and running it in your old trainers having done no training at all.
When you feel like asking “Are we nearly there yet?” just sit back and enjoy your journey into recovery.
I promise you that if you continue to read these pages, and if you keep practising my tips and tricks, there will come a day when something hits you between the eyes.
It will happen in this sort of way. You will ‘hear’ the thought, or say out loud to the person next to you: “I couldn’t have done that 3 months/6 months/a year ago.
When that happens – remember this. You heard it here first.
That was my promise to you. It’s the icing on your cake 😉